thinglets: Another "I Can't Believe I Saw It In A Theater" Movie

Metalstorm: The Destruction of Jared-Syn is an absolutely horrid science-fiction film that is a disservice to the genre. To top the fact that I've "seen" the film, I saw it the premiere in a theater in my hometown of Hamilton, Ontario. Other than the novelty of getting 3D glasses and a magic-motion sticker on the way, there was little to save this 1983 effort. Believe it or not, this is the plot summary and probably the pitch that was given to sell producers on the concept:

A seeker named Dogen rescues Dhyana after her father is murdered by the evil Jared-Syn. To avenge her father's death, Dogen must find Jared-Syn's hideout in the mysterious "Lost City", but the only person who knows where it is an aging, burned-out seeker named Rhodes. Along the way, they will need to do battle against the hunter Baal and his Cyclopean minions for engaging Jared-Syn in a final encounter.

With soap opera regular Jeffrey Byron in the lead role, it seems that most of the Hollywood establishment found a way to avoid this stinker. Even Kelly Preston's second film role couldn't save this. Richard Moll (aka Bull from Night Court) rounds off the "star power" in this one. Being 15 when this piece of crap came out, I was savvy enough to know how crappy it was, and have used it as a pop culture reference to illuminate all that's wrong with 80's sci-fi film since then.