thinglets: 10 Mutations I'm Looking For Venture Capital Funding To Develop

  1. Some kind of snake rattling system to let people know I'm pissed off and don't want to talk. I hate when I try to tell people I'm in a "mood" and that they shouldn't bother me, only to have them ask "What's wrong?" and want to talk about it.
  2. Some kind of crazy Monsanto bio-textile shirt made of grass that sparkles with dew at dawn.
  3. Some kind of ET luminescent heart that would save me money on night light batteries.
  4. Some kind of auto-hair that was self-cleaning and coiffing.
  5. Some kind of eyes that project holograms so that no matter where I am, I will have entertainment.
  6. Some kind of radio wave telepathy that would make people say "What the fuck am I saying! I just lied my ass off to you!" after lying their ass off to me.
  7. Some kind of magic legislative powers that would prevent Hollywood from remaking, re-imagining, rehashing, or re-inventing films and characters and plots that were obsolete 50 years ago.
  8. Some kind of music mind time machine wipe that would allow me to forget every Genesis song after "Misunderstanding" (which was strangely appropriate for everything that came after) ...oh, and BTW, also erase every solo Phil Collins recording ever except the drum roll from "In the Air Tonight" for when I'm drunk.
  9. Some kind of ability that would allow me to taste a fantastic aged Old Cheddar without ever having to go out an buy it.
  10. Some kind of ability to sense and levitate drink and foodstuffs that were about to fall on my shirt and stain it in the morning when I had shit to do that day.

Or how about just being able to do 1/10th the things this guy can do: