thinglets: High School Musical 70's Style

I figure that since the majority of people working at McDonald's now are high school students, and we all know that High School students are prone to break out into song about anything, these gentlemen (who were very happy at mopping and cleaning out grease traps) must be the closest thing the 70s had to High School Musical... expect Fame.

thinglets: 5 Crazy Sci-Fi Cereal Boxes

As crazy as most cereal boxes are when they introduce characters and mascots, sometimes the non-traditional juxtapositions make for the nuttiest futuristic things you never thought you'd see as part of your cereal box fort.

1) Spock Sugar Smacks

2) C-3POs

3) PEP - The Solar Cereal

4) Quisp

5) E.T.

and as an added bonus... which isn't really sci-fi, but I imagine could get you high!

lovehate: John Hughes - The 80's Shakespeare

"Screws fall out all the time, the world is an imperfect place."
- John Bender (The Breakfast Club)

Upon the passing of John Hughes, who most of us remember as a director, it behooves us to think back to his writing output that extended up until 2008. Hughes only directed eight films, including many 80's teen classics, and even though many of his scripts could be deemed silly, populist, or juvenile, there was an undeniable ability to tell a story and reach niche audiences.

As you peruse the following list, there are certainly some films that you may regard as "stinkers", but you'll have heard of almost all of them if you are a fan of Hollywood productions.

I know that John Hughes is not often referred to in the canon of great directors or Hollywood writers, but his are some of the most loved stories of a generation. He was master of the youth archetype. He married contemporary music with interwoven plot. His characters exuded fun, angst, and shared in conclusions of poetic justice. I daresay that had I the energy or inclination, I could draw parallels between Hughes' plots and The Bard.

John Bender as the tough guy with a heart of gold. Samantha Baker as the tortured teen who's fantasies come true. Gary Wallace as the quintessential 80's tech geek. Ferris Bueller as the untouchable Puck who we all wanted to be.

He inspired us to fight authority, have fun, be individualistic and fight for what believed in. He was an icon of pop culture and there was a time when his name attached to a film meant, at the very least, an entertaining character-driven romp.

We'll miss you Mr. Hughes. I can think of no better eulogy than the contemplation of the following:


Drillbit Taylor (2008)
Beethoven's 5th (2003) (V)
Maid in Manhattan (2002)
Home Alone 4 (2002) (TV)
Beethoven's 4th (2001) (V)
Beethoven's 3rd (2000) (V)
American Adventure (2000) (TV)
Reach the Rock (1998)
Home Alone 3 (1997)
Flubber (1997)
101 Dalmatians (1996)
Miracle on 34th Street (1994)
Baby's Day Out (1994)
Beethoven's 2nd (1993)
Dennis the Menace (1993)
Home Alone 2: Lost in New York (1992)

...and the decade we'll all remember...

Beethoven (1992)
Curly Sue (1991)
Dutch (1991)
Career Opportunities (1991)
Home Alone (1990)
Christmas Vacation (1989)
Uncle Buck (1989)
The Great Outdoors (1988)
She's Having a Baby (1988)
Planes, Trains & Automobiles (1987)
Some Kind of Wonderful (1987)
Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986)
Pretty in Pink (1986)
Weird Science (1985)
European Vacation (1985)
The Breakfast Club (1985)
Sixteen Candles (1984)
Nate and Hayes (1983)
Vacation (1983)
Mr. Mom (1983)
Class Reunion (1982)

thinglets: Bimbo the Freakshow Birthday Clown

I grew up with this demented, surrealistic freakshow called The Uncle Bobby Show every day as a kid. I don't think it ever extended outside of Canada. You know that creepy, perv uncle in everyone's family... this is him.

If you want to subject yourself to a WTF? moment or two as you watch the daily Birthday celebration from a host I'm sure was polluted beyond belief and a guest "Birthday Picker" who looks like she rolled out of his dressing room two minutes earlier, you gotta check this out.

Bimbo the clown looks like a hobo on a ripple bender and the crazy marionettes that fall from the ceiling are the icing on the demented cake - enjoy!

thinglets: The Real G-force

You can forget your crazy guinea pig wannabes capturing box office glory. This is what G-Force should be remembered as... well... actually it should probably be remembered as Gatchaman from the original Japanamation which didn't included the cheezoid Americanized 7Zark7 and 1Rover1. Still, the G-Force of my youth were Mark, Jason, Princess, Keopp and Tiny with the Fiery Phoenix and Whirlwind Pyramid.

Forget about the Rodents. Bring me Zoltar!

thinglets: The Harlem Globetrotters on Gilligan's Island with Robots

If, even back in cheesy TV days of 1981, I pitched a made-for-TV movie to you that read as follows, how much money would you sink into it?

"The famous Harlem Globetrotters crash land on Gilligan's Island, immediately dispatching a terrifying 'shark' by throwing basketballs at it. A mad doctor and his accomplice plan to take over the island for its rich energy supply by scaring off Gilligan and his buddies, but it soon settles to a basketball match between the doctor's robots and the aforementioned Globetrotters." (via

In addition to this ridiculous plotline, the film would have a new actress playing Ginger, star Martin Landau, Stu Nahan, Chick Hearn, and Scatman Crothers.

After waking up from your incredulous fainting spell and screaming: NO ONE WOULD EVER MAKE THIS FILM!, watch the clip above.

You now have a new term of reference for "The New Invincibles".

thinglets: K-tel "Pure Power" commercial

I'm not sure what the definition of Power was when they put this compilation together, but Dream Weaver, an Alice Cooper ballad, and another ballad by England Dan and John Ford Coley have never screamed "POWER" to me. That, and a Kiss song that sounds more like Roots Rock than their regular catalogue, made Pure Power a powerful misnomer... and that said, the 70's cheese addict in me LOVES this freakin' album OR 8-track.