thinglets: Bimbo the Freakshow Birthday Clown

I grew up with this demented, surrealistic freakshow called The Uncle Bobby Show every day as a kid. I don't think it ever extended outside of Canada. You know that creepy, perv uncle in everyone's family... this is him.

If you want to subject yourself to a WTF? moment or two as you watch the daily Birthday celebration from a host I'm sure was polluted beyond belief and a guest "Birthday Picker" who looks like she rolled out of his dressing room two minutes earlier, you gotta check this out.

Bimbo the clown looks like a hobo on a ripple bender and the crazy marionettes that fall from the ceiling are the icing on the demented cake - enjoy!

thinglets: The Real G-force

You can forget your crazy guinea pig wannabes capturing box office glory. This is what G-Force should be remembered as... well... actually it should probably be remembered as Gatchaman from the original Japanamation which didn't included the cheezoid Americanized 7Zark7 and 1Rover1. Still, the G-Force of my youth were Mark, Jason, Princess, Keopp and Tiny with the Fiery Phoenix and Whirlwind Pyramid.

Forget about the Rodents. Bring me Zoltar!

thinglets: The Harlem Globetrotters on Gilligan's Island with Robots

If, even back in cheesy TV days of 1981, I pitched a made-for-TV movie to you that read as follows, how much money would you sink into it?

"The famous Harlem Globetrotters crash land on Gilligan's Island, immediately dispatching a terrifying 'shark' by throwing basketballs at it. A mad doctor and his accomplice plan to take over the island for its rich energy supply by scaring off Gilligan and his buddies, but it soon settles to a basketball match between the doctor's robots and the aforementioned Globetrotters." (via

In addition to this ridiculous plotline, the film would have a new actress playing Ginger, star Martin Landau, Stu Nahan, Chick Hearn, and Scatman Crothers.

After waking up from your incredulous fainting spell and screaming: NO ONE WOULD EVER MAKE THIS FILM!, watch the clip above.

You now have a new term of reference for "The New Invincibles".

Podcast 100 - Anniversary 1, Episode 100, The Centennial Screed

Thanks to everyone who's listened to podcast over the past year. On the first anniversary of Episode One of the lovehatethings podcast, I present Episode One Hundred, including discourses on the stagnancy of the Blu-Ray format, the reverse evolution of the remote control, and a summer list to get you a speeding ticket: The Top Ten Classic Arena Rock Summer Fast Driving Songs of All-Time.

lovehate: The Evolution of the Remote Interface

Every tech and gaming conference has some sort of new-fangled physical interface to control a console or your television. Companies roll out, with great aplomb, science-fiction device which allow us to wipe our hands over the screen to manipulate objects. They develop crazy motion sensors where flailing around like a spastic synchronized swimmer will allow you to control your game avatar to do something athletic or violent. They forecast the next phase of television remote controls where you can wave your hand in some funky Z pattern to change a channel or draw a sparkler-like O to bring up a menu.

In essence every new interface system is going to require me to work HARDER?

I'll reluctantly admit that we're probably years away from an affordable voice user interface or (dreaming) a thought-based interface, but does this mean we have to retreat backwards?

As a kid I had to stand up and walk across the room to turn the television on or off, turn the channel dial, or turn the volume dial. There was literally TRAVEL involved in flipping from Laff-a-lympics to the Krofft Supershow at 10am on Saturday morning. But I didn't know any different, and was more than happy to get the frequent flipper miles. Plus, I was fueled by the sugar of two bowls of Honey Comb and had to work off the rush somehow. Eventually the television interface became a row of channel-changing buttons to punch before the eventual evolution of infrared.

When GUIs demanded a point and click device, you couldn't ask for something less labor-intensive than the mouse. I circumnavigate a cursor around the screen by moving a lightweight plastic dome an inch or two and depressing a plastic panel by a couple of millimeters. Far easier than typing in "change directory" commands followed by obtuse strings of subdirectories, the mouse has embodied micromovements.

And even more micro is the effort required to change a channel in the infrared world. I can change a channel by pressing a button with my thumb. Let me repeat that - where I used to have to stand up and walk ten feet to television and crank a dial from the number 2 to the number 13, now I can change a channel by pressing a button with my thumb. Why the HELL do we want to make this more difficult?

Sure, if you're part of the Wii-Fit cult that has to jog enough to power a grist mill in order to get your Mario Brother avatar to do jumping jacks, I suppose you're excited about a channel-changing calisthenics regime. But if you're like me, and you're thumb hasn't developed a repetitive strain injury, fight for simplicity. Don't let the Interface Interfaith Believers make waving and running an expectation for home electronics control. Until I can affect electronics by the power of my mind, my thumb'll do just fine thanks.

lovehate: Things That Happened While The World Watched the MJ Awards Show... sorry... Memorial.

There has rarely been more irony than watching a cast of singers gather on a stage singing "We Are The World" while hundreds of millions of people look on and effectively IGNORE the world which marches on with precious time to care for a dead entertainer.

Below are just some things that happened in the world on the day that the hordes sat transfixed watching what will probably be nominated for a daytime Emmy next year:

"Thousands of angry Han Chinese, many of them armed and seeking vengeance for deaths in rioting two days earlier, surged through the capital of the northwestern region of Xinjiang on Tuesday looking for Uighur targets... "It's your time to suffer," they shouted at some of the five and six-storey apartment blocks lining Xinfu Road, which protesters said saw some of the worst destruction in Sunday's riots that killed 156 people and injured 1,080.

"Ousted Honduran President Manuel Zelaya on Tuesday accepted a U.S.-backed effort by Costa Rican President Oscar Arias to mediate in Honduras and said talks with his rivals would begin on Thursday."

"Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad said on Tuesday the disputed presidential election was the world's "freest" vote, while opposition leaders criticized the "security state" imposed after the polls... Human rights activists say 2,000 people, including opposition leaders, academics, journalists and students may still be in detention

"Major economies tried on Tuesday to break the deadlock between rich and poor nations over 2050 goals for cuts in greenhouse gas emissions at a last-minute meeting before an expanded G8 summit in Italy."

"Benin has declared a state of emergency and called for international humanitarian aid after floods hit the south of the West African country. The government estimates that some 2,000 families have already been displaced by flooding caused by heavy rains and it appealed late on Monday for immediate help to prevent the imminent spread of epidemics."

"Along the road to Afgooye, west of Mogadishu, half a million people are living in temporary shelters made from sticks and plastic sheeting and there is very limited access to health care. There is a desperate shortage of food and water, and settlements of internally displaced people are overcrowded, posing a serious risk for epidemics, such as measles or cholera."

"Two bombs exploded in two restive areas in the southern Philippines on Tuesday, killing two people and wounding dozens , officials said, prompting authorities to step up security around state offices in the capital Manila."

DyscultureD Podcast Thirty Eight: The Double Down

This week's episode!

My other web outlet is at DyscultureD where we do a weekly podcast on all things right and wrong with pop culture. Follow the link above to this week's episode... show notes below.

Full Dysclosure

  • The scratch ticket affair that is the MJ memorial
  • Bell buys Virgin Mobile and The Source
  • BNN buckles on IP and copyright video clips
  • Pirate Bay sells short
  • Alternate Bit Torrent options
  • Browser Wars Part @?$#%
  • Canadian made TV hitting US Big 3
  • Cheap Trick’s not-so-cheap trick in music promotion

Websites of the Week

  • Mike - - a simple recommendation engine for your NEXT read
  • Anth - - ever lost a user manual for a gadget or appliance? Find it here.


Laura Smith - I Spy a Monster -

thinglets: Polka Dot Door - Polkaroo In Space

Okay, if you weren't from Canada (and specifically Ontario) you may have never seen the Polka Dot Door while growing up. And, if you never saw the Polka Dot Door, you never saw Polkaroo. Polkaroo was one of the best legal trips one could have as a kid. Always a bit surreal and bit insane, the Polkaroo could express a million thoughts with any number of well-placed instances of the ubiquitous "Polkaroo".

Take the three minute trip of this video clip, or, to translate: "Polkaroo? Polkaroo!"

thinglets: The Kingdom of Could Be You

The first episode of this PSA, between-Saturday-morning-cartoon, episodic from 1972. I still remember the theme song from this years later. There's no way I remember the original air date as it must have run for several years, but I was just happy when I didn't have to watch "In the News" sponsored by Kellog's.

I think this was on sometime after Speed Buggy and before the The Krofft Supershow... ah, it brings me back to a happy place.

lovehate: The Ten Commandments of Not Pissing Me Off



Thou shalt not try to convince me there is a God or gods or godesses or demons or devils or cosmic intelligences we surely don't understand. If you want to buy into all of that, go crazy, but leave my realist brain out of your cornfield.


Thou shalt not try to convince me that Prince or the Artist Formerly Known as Sane is a musical god for two reasons. One is contained in commandment number one, and two is that the man, while clearly possessing talent, took a long walk off the pretentious pier long ago and convinced himself he was Aquaman in the process.


Thou shalt not try to convince me that the chemicals in fast food are going to kill me someday. I live in a city that chuffs out more carcinogens a day into the air than you can imagine. I was weaned on the stuff. My body is a chemical factory. When I die, and my body decays in the ground, you may as well salt the earth because nothing is growing there again. And if you cremate me, anyone looking at the smokestack will think that Jerry Garcia's been elected pope.


Thou shalt not come to a COMPLETE STOP when making a right turn with no stop sign, no oncoming traffic, and no possible reason to slow down to a crawl other than the faint possibility your heart has stopped because you're sneezing from the dust gathered on your living corpse that moves too slow.


Thou shalt not take a look at the Double Gulp Diet Coke I bought at 7-11 and say "How can you drink all of that?" Like anyone drinks! Okay you idiot? Starting with my mouth, ending with my bladder, wash, rinse, repeat! Got it?


Thou shalt not exclaim, for any earthly reason, "same difference". Other than being oxymoronic, it's just plain imbecilic save for one example: 10 minus 8, 5 minus 3, 2009 minus 2007 is the same difference.


Thou shalt not try to justify the ingestible viability of any gelatin made from reduced animal hoofs. Oh I know that during the great depression your ancestors may have lived off the stuff along with fatback and pork sausage, but that doesn't change the fact I'd rather eat a dolphin.


Thou shalt not try to convince me there are secret conspiracies bent on overtaking the world. Get your head out of your ass and smell the soot and sulphur. There are plenty of completely visible organizations trying to take over the world that have great PR contracts to boot. The fact that anyone believes Britney Spears has talent or that A-Rod is anything but an asshole or that this entire Susan Boyle thing isn't a complete fabrication is definitive proof of that.


Thou shalt not claim to be good at television trivia without being able to sing at least 20 theme songs, word for word, from the 70s or earlier. You will be excused from one theme for each well-placed reference to the Wondertwins or Gatchaman (Battle of the Planets for all you unbelievers).


Thou shalt not, through any circumstances, under pain of verbal tirade and relentless mocking through a series of pop culture subreferences, fly footloose and fancy-free with the definitive article "the" before things like: Walmart, Twitter, Windows, Google, or Kids Today.


Thou shalt not expect me to hold to any promises or parameters of only holding to lists of ten things when clearly it's permissible for me to take things to eleven.


Thou shalt not expect anything less than the unexpected grapefruit edsel waffle iron ukelele.