lovehatethings

Every tech and gaming conference has some sort of new-fangled physical interface to control a console or your television. Companies roll out, with great aplomb, science-fiction device which allow us to wipe our hands over the screen to manipulate objects. They develop crazy motion sensors where flailing around like a spastic synchronized swimmer will allow you to control your game avatar to do something athletic or violent. They forecast the next phase of television remote controls where you can wave your hand in some funky Z pattern to change a channel or draw a sparkler-like O to bring up a menu.

There has rarely been more irony than watching a cast of singers gather on a stage singing "We Are The World" while hundreds of millions of people look on and effectively IGNORE the world which marches on with precious time to care for a dead entertainer.

Below are just some things that happened in the world on the day that the hordes sat transfixed watching what will probably be nominated for a daytime Emmy next year:

"Thousands of angry Han Chinese, many of them armed and seeking vengeance for deaths in rioting two days earlier, surged through the capital of the northwestern region of Xinjiang on Tuesday looking for Uighur targets... "It's your time to suffer," they shouted at some of the five and six-storey apartment blocks lining Xinfu Road, which protesters said saw some of the worst destruction in Sunday's riots that killed 156 people and injured 1,080.

"Ousted Honduran President Manuel Zelaya on Tuesday accepted a U.S.-backed effort by Costa Rican President Oscar Arias to mediate in Honduras and said talks with his rivals would begin on Thursday."

"Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad said on Tuesday the disputed presidential election was the world's "freest" vote, while opposition leaders criticized the "security state" imposed after the polls... Human rights activists say 2,000 people, including opposition leaders, academics, journalists and students may still be in detention

"Major economies tried on Tuesday to break the deadlock between rich and poor nations over 2050 goals for cuts in greenhouse gas emissions at a last-minute meeting before an expanded G8 summit in Italy."

"Benin has declared a state of emergency and called for international humanitarian aid after floods hit the south of the West African country. The government estimates that some 2,000 families have already been displaced by flooding caused by heavy rains and it appealed late on Monday for immediate help to prevent the imminent spread of epidemics."

"Along the road to Afgooye, west of Mogadishu, half a million people are living in temporary shelters made from sticks and plastic sheeting and there is very limited access to health care. There is a desperate shortage of food and water, and settlements of internally displaced people are overcrowded, posing a serious risk for epidemics, such as measles or cholera."

"Two bombs exploded in two restive areas in the southern Philippines on Tuesday, killing two people and wounding dozens , officials said, prompting authorities to step up security around state offices in the capital Manila."

This week's episode!

My other web outlet is at DyscultureD where we do a weekly podcast on all things right and wrong with pop culture. Follow the link above to this week's episode... show notes below.

Full Dysclosure

• The scratch ticket affair that is the MJ memorial
• Bell buys Virgin Mobile and The Source
• BNN buckles on IP and copyright video clips
• Pirate Bay sells short
• Alternate Bit Torrent options
• Browser Wars Part @?$#%
• Canadian made TV hitting US Big 3
• Cheap Trick’s not-so-cheap trick in music promotion

Websites of the Week

• Mike - bookseer.com - a simple recommendation engine for your NEXT read
• Anth - theusermanualsite.com - ever lost a user manual for a gadget or appliance? Find it here.

Music

Laura Smith - I Spy a Monster - www.laurasmithmusic.com

I.

Thou shalt not try to convince me there is a God or gods or godesses or demons or devils or cosmic intelligences we surely don't understand. If you want to buy into all of that, go crazy, but leave my realist brain out of your cornfield.

II.

Thou shalt not try to convince me that Prince or the Artist Formerly Known as Sane is a musical god for two reasons. One is contained in commandment number one, and two is that the man, while clearly possessing talent, took a long walk off the pretentious pier long ago and convinced himself he was Aquaman in the process.

III.

Thou shalt not try to convince me that the chemicals in fast food are going to kill me someday. I live in a city that chuffs out more carcinogens a day into the air than you can imagine. I was weaned on the stuff. My body is a chemical factory. When I die, and my body decays in the ground, you may as well salt the earth because nothing is growing there again. And if you cremate me, anyone looking at the smokestack will think that Jerry Garcia's been elected pope.

IV.

Thou shalt not come to a COMPLETE STOP when making a right turn with no stop sign, no oncoming traffic, and no possible reason to slow down to a crawl other than the faint possibility your heart has stopped because you're sneezing from the dust gathered on your living corpse that moves too slow.

V.

Thou shalt not take a look at the Double Gulp Diet Coke I bought at 7-11 and say "How can you drink all of that?" Like anyone drinks! Okay you idiot? Starting with my mouth, ending with my bladder, wash, rinse, repeat! Got it?

VI.

Thou shalt not exclaim, for any earthly reason, "same difference". Other than being oxymoronic, it's just plain imbecilic save for one example: 10 minus 8, 5 minus 3, 2009 minus 2007 is the same difference.

VII.

Thou shalt not try to justify the ingestible viability of any gelatin made from reduced animal hoofs. Oh I know that during the great depression your ancestors may have lived off the stuff along with fatback and pork sausage, but that doesn't change the fact I'd rather eat a dolphin.

VIII.

Thou shalt not try to convince me there are secret conspiracies bent on overtaking the world. Get your head out of your ass and smell the soot and sulphur. There are plenty of completely visible organizations trying to take over the world that have great PR contracts to boot. The fact that anyone believes Britney Spears has talent or that A-Rod is anything but an asshole or that this entire Susan Boyle thing isn't a complete fabrication is definitive proof of that.

IX.

Thou shalt not claim to be good at television trivia without being able to sing at least 20 theme songs, word for word, from the 70s or earlier. You will be excused from one theme for each well-placed reference to the Wondertwins or Gatchaman (Battle of the Planets for all you unbelievers).

X.

Thou shalt not, through any circumstances, under pain of verbal tirade and relentless mocking through a series of pop culture subreferences, fly footloose and fancy-free with the definitive article "the" before things like: Walmart, Twitter, Windows, Google, or Kids Today.

XI.

Thou shalt not expect me to hold to any promises or parameters of only holding to lists of ten things when clearly it's permissible for me to take things to eleven.

XII.

Thou shalt not expect anything less than the unexpected grapefruit edsel waffle iron ukelele.